Plus, How to Avoid Useless Parenting Fights
Fatherly
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WE ALL HAVE OUR MOMENTS. STRESSORS ARE EVERYWHERE AND, DESPITE OUR BEST EFFORTS
TO KEEP A COOL HEAD, ANGER TAKES OVER. THE PROBLEM IS THAT ANGER HIJACKS OUR
BRAIN AND MAKES IT DIFFICULT TO PROCESS EMOTIONS AND EASY TO SAY OR DO THINGS
THAT WE DON’T MEAN. SO, WHAT DO YOU DO? WHEN YOU BECOME SO ANGRY THAT YOU CAN’T
PROCESS EMOTIONS ANYMORE, HOW CAN YOU MANAGE IT? AND WHAT DO YOU SAY WHEN YOU’RE
TOO ANGRY TO TALK? IT COMES DOWN TO UNDERSTANDING, MANAGING, AND EXPLAINING YOUR
EMOTIONS. THIS TAKES SOME PRACTICE, BUT IT’S A SKILL WELL WORTH PERFECTING.
SELF
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WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU’RE TOO ANGRY TO TALK
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EVEN IF YOU HAVE NO WORDS, YOU STILL HAVE TO CHOOSE THEM WISELY
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READ THE STORY
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TIPS AND TRICKS
ABOUT TO LOSE YOUR COOL? DEBATE YOUR OWN THOUGHTS
PARENTING (AND LIFE) CAN BE TOUGH. IT’S EASY TO FOCUS ON THE HARD STUFF,
ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU’RE ALREADY STRESSED OUT. THE PROBLEM IS, LETTING YOUR
THOUGHTS TRAIL OFF UNCHECKED CAN ADD TO YOUR SENSE OF OVERWHELM. IF YOU FIND
YOURSELF ON THE EDGE OF LOSING YOUR COOL, MOLLY DUTTER-ANSARI, PHD, AN ASSISTANT
PROFESSOR AT BRADLEY UNIVERSITY’S ONLINE MASTERS OF COUNSELING PROGRAM,SAYS IT’S
IMPORTANT TO CHECK IN WITH YOUR THOUGHTS. ARE YOU CATASTROPHIZING SOMETHING THAT
COULD BE MANAGED, OR BEING OVERLY BLACK AND WHITE ABOUT THE SITUATION YOU’RE
FACING? IF SO, IT MAY BE TIME TO INFUSE SOME LOGIC INTO YOUR IRRATIONAL
THINKING.
FOR EXAMPLE, IF YOUR KID HAS BEEN ACTING UP WAY MORE THAN USUAL, YOU MAY BE
ENTERTAINING THOUGHTS THAT PARENTING IS MISERABLE, AND YOU’LL NEVER ENJOY BEING
WITH YOUR KID. OR IF YOUR MARRIAGE HAS BEEN TOUGH LATELY, YOU MAY FIND YOURSELF
THINKING YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS DESTINED TO END.
WHILE THOSE THINGS MAY FEEL REAL, CHANCES ARE, YOU’VE GOTTEN WAY AHEAD OF
YOURSELF. ONCE YOU IDENTIFY THOUGHTS THAT ARE CONTRIBUTING TO YOUR STRESS, WORK
ON REPLACING THEM WITH MORE REALISTIC ONES — FOR INSTANCE, “THIS MOMENT IS HARD,
BUT I’LL WORK THROUGH IT LIKE I ALWAYS HAVE.”
FURTHER READING
* HOW TO TELL IF YOUR ANGER IS AN ISSUE
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* ARE YOU A SHORT-TEMPERED DAD? THIS IS HOW TO STAY IN CONTROL
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* WHAT TO SAY TO HELP AN ANGRY PERSON CALM DOWN
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MONEY
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3 INVESTMENTS TO CONSIDER DURING TIMES OF INFLATION
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WITH CONSUMER PRICES SOARING, IT'S IMPORTANT TO LOOK FOR INVESTMENT OPTIONS THAT
CAN KEEP PACE.
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READ THE STORY
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LOVE
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HOW TO AVOID USELESS PARENTING FIGHTS
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EVERY COUPLE HAS PARENTING DISAGREEMENTS. THE KEY IS LEARNING HOW TO MAKE THEM
AS PRODUCTIVE AS POSSIBLE — AND PICKING YOUR BATTLES.
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READ THE STORY
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TIPS AND TRICKS
SEND THIS TO YOUR PARTNER AFTER A BIG FIGHT
THE TEXT: “I WANT TO FIGURE THIS OUT, AND I HOPE WE CAN FIND A WAY TO DO IT
WHILE BEING KIND TO EACH OTHER.”
WHY? AFTER A BIG ARGUMENT YOU MAY BE TEMPTED TO WRITE SOMETHING LIKE, “I DON’T
WANT TO FIGHT…” BUT INSERTING A WORD LIKE “FIGHT” INTO THE CONVERSATION, EVEN
WITH THE BEST INTENTIONS, CAN CREATE VOLATILITY OR EVEN COME OFF AS A SLIGHT
THREAT, EXPLAINS DR. MIMI WINSBERG. INSTEAD, AIM TO SUGGEST WORKING THINGS OUT
RATIONALLY AND PEACEFULLY. “IN DOING SO, YOU EMPHASIZE KINDNESS AND STILL LEAVE
ROOM FOR RESPECTFUL DISAGREEMENT,” SHE SAYS.
WHETHER YOU WANT TO SEND A TACTFUL MESSAGE OF REGRET FOR TAKING THINGS TOO FAR
OR A SIMPLE NOTE TO HELP YOU RE-ENGAGE LATER, HERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT WORDS TO
SAY AFTER A BIG FIGHT.
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PLAY
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OSCAR ISAAC’S FIRST TIME HOSTING SNL WAS A BIG SUCCESS
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FROM THE OPENING MONOLOGUE TO A KILLER BIT ABOUT PAW PATROL, HERE ARE THE FOUR
FUNNIEST MOMENTS FROM THE SHOW.
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READ THE STORY
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