[ The prolific LA poet Alexis Rhone Fancher offers a strong a poem
of grief and the absence of legacy. ]
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PORTSIDE CULTURE

BAD MOTHER  
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Alexis Rhone Fancher
January 1, 2020
American Journal of Poetry
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_ The prolific LA poet Alexis Rhone Fancher offers a strong a poem of
grief and the absence of legacy. _

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Bad Mother

By Alexis Rhone Fancher

My boy died young.

I was a bad mother.

So was my mother.

My best excuse?

When she died young

I fell off the earth.

Think thud/careen not spiral.

Think death wish. Free-fall.

A blueprint, the way I see it.

Soupçon for self-loathing,

with a narcotic chaser.

(Lovers who’d sell me out

for a half-gram of coke.)

Not good choices.

My mother threw me to the wolves.

Loved my sister (the easier one)

and my brother more.

Died when I needed her most.

My dead boy sealed my fate.

My only one.

I pondered suicide.

Learned to police my head.

Mind over matter, my mother said.

But she never lost a child.

My near-fatal accident at twenty.

The day my little brother almost drowned.

Even then, my mother had 2 spare kids.

I should have had more.

Alexis Rhone Fancher is published in _Best American Poetry,
Rattle,Verse Daily, The American _

_Journal of Poetry, Plume, Diode, Flock, _and elsewhere. She’s
authored nine poetry collections, 

most recently_, DUETS (Small Harbor), Stiletto Killer (Edizone
Italia) _and _EROTIC: New & _

_Selected (NYQ Books)_. _BRAZEN, _her next full-length collection,
again from _NYQ Books,_

will publish in early March, 2023. A multiple Pushcart Prize and Best
of the Net nominee, 

Alexis is poetry editor of _Cultural
Daily_. www.alexisrhonefancher.com
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