It happens in an instant. When you reconnect with an old friend, all of a sudden, you’re transported back to an earlier time. Whether you last saw your old friend ten, twenty or even thirty years ago, you find yourself just picking up like it was only yesterday. It’s like time has stood still. These are precious relationships. And if you are fortunate to have even a handful of such relationships, then you truly understand the meaning of the saying that ‘old friends are like gold.’
The truth is, we’ll meet a lot of people over the course of a lifetime. With some we’ll have brief encounters, others perhaps a little longer, maybe some will become acquaintances, and even fewer of those we’d consider a friend. And then there are those friends with whom we share a deep bond of ‘friendship’ - through the good and the bad – and these are the relationships that are so deeply meaningful. These friendships tend to endure changing circumstances like new jobs, long-term absences, and changed or differing interests. At times it may seem odd that as we change or evolve, how is it that some of our oldest friends are the ones that make us more comfortable? Why do we tend to place more value on those who have been in our lives the longest?
Our oldest friends are often a good barometer of ourselves. They’ve known us the longest and have seen us evolve from our younger, perhaps more aspirational selves from the past into the adults we are in the present. This can be especially important if we’re going through a difficult time, helping us feel grounded again, reminding us of our potential, while also offering some honest advice we might not hear from someone we haven’t known as long. Our oldest friends offer us a safe space to be ourselves, without judgement. In short, they remind us of who we are.
I was reminded of this in a conversation I recently had with a friend going through some difficult family challenges. It’d been a few years since we’d last connected, but we picked up right where we left off, catching up, sharing stories, providing advice, and offering some perspective. After our chat, I walked away feeling more upbeat and genuinely grateful not only for the memories my friend and I have shared over the years, but for how those shared memories allowed us to share yet another important moment together. Not only that, but a few days later my friend called me to tell me just how important us reconnecting was and that it helped him change his entire perspective on the difficulties he was facing on the home front. “I was forgetting ‘who I know I am meant to be,’ and our conversation helped remind me of that” he told me.
We often talk about the importance of the little things in the Sunshine Report. Whether it be a plate of pancakes or a conversation with an old friend, these little things not only make life worthwhile, but they give us both perspective and guidance. They help us make decisions big and small that can lead to positive outcomes in our lives when we choose to be grateful for them. So if it’s been a while since you’ve connected with an old friend but it’s been on your mind, give‘em a call or set up some time to get together, it could make all the difference for you both!
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