If you're lucky enough to still have yours around, learn as much as you can. These questions can help.
3 Things Grandparents Need to Say to Their Grandkids
1. “You Can Always Talk to Us About Anything”
Although kids should always know, per above, that authorities in the family are a united front, grandma and grandpa need to let their grandkids know that they are always there to be a sounding board — even when the problem involves mom and dad. “They can be role models and sounding boards for kids when they are frustrated or in need of nurturing,” says psychologist Dr. Sherrie Campbell. Does this mean that grandma and grandpa should always side with them? No. But they need to make it clear that they are there when they need them.
2. “I Agree with Your Parents”
Although this feels more like tough love than anything else, young kids need to know that their parents and their grandparents are a united front. That way, the kids don’t go to grandma and grandpa to get to do things that mom and dad don’t let them do, and grandma and grandpa aren’t in the awkward position of being the good guys to the parents’ bad.
“Kids need their grandparents to be on the same side as their parents, rather than being on the opposite side and confusing the kids about who is right,” says Campbell. “Grandparents are wisdom givers and need to bring a maturity and composure to the relationship they have with their grandchildren.
3. “You Have a Right to Feel the Way You Feel”
Grandparents are in a unique position to help their grandkids feel free to express their emotions, especially because the kids’ feelings are likely not about their relationship and have to do with friendships, their parents, or other concerns. Given their serious wisdom in life, grandparents should help their kids talk about their feelings. Says family and individual therapist Anne Reiner, “they can reinforce positive messages, help their grandchildren identify their feelings, and put them into words.”
The bond between a child and his grandparent can be a magical thing. Here are some more examples of what grandparents should be telling their grandkids more often.
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A Helpful Tip for Talking to Someone Who’s Vaccine Hesitant: Ask Questions
People’s motivations and questions about vaccines can be very different, but there are common threads that are helpful when having a conversation about them, says Chris Wyant, executive director of Made to Save, a nonprofit promoting vaccination. Make it personal, talk about your experience, such as any side-effects you had and what they were like. Instead of telling them why you want them to get it, ask what questions they might have, and avoid judging their decision.
Asking questions is a positive way to engage people because it encourages them to think for themselves and possibly answer their own questions. If someone says they want to wait to see how the vaccine affects people who have gotten it, for example, maybe ask, “When would it be safe?” or “How many would have to get it before you decide it’s safe for you and your family?” This can help engage someone to come to terms with what the real obstacle is for them.
You need tact and a great deal of empathy to get through to someone who is vaccine hesitant. Here are a few more tips to keep in mind.
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