3 Things Couples That Respect One Another Always Do
1. They Validate Each Other
Validation is one of the most important things couples can do for each other. Having your partner hear what you’re saying, appreciate you, and understand you speaks to a basic need for connection. It’s okay to disagree, as long as you can respect where each other is coming from. “Healthy couples know that feelings aren’t right or wrong or true or false,” says Thomas Gagliano, a social worker and speaker. “This is a very important message to give to your children as well. It helps resolve conflict instead of doing a destructive dance feeling that we don’t matter to each other.”
2. They Play to Each Other’s Strengths
The two-way-street idea of marriage makes sense, but it doesn’t always hold true. There are times where one partner has to give a little more than the other, or there are times when one or the other has to step up and handle more, from household chores to child care to emotional support (such as in the wake of the loss of a loved one or an illness). “Successful couples know that every situation isn’t a 50/50 deal,” says Gagliano. “In some situations one partner can give more and expect less as long as it isn’t the same partner doing all the giving. That’s okay as long as both parents are on the same page.”
3. They’re Unafraid of Honesty
The truth can be uncomfortable, but a couple that has mutual respect is one that isn’t afraid to put it out there. They can deal with the feelings of anger that might come from discussing harsh truths because they have the bigger picture in mind. If you want respect, then don’t be scared of the truth. “Be brave,” urges Walfish. “Honesty in a relationship is extremely important because it is the fundamental thing that makes a person feel safe. Even if you think the truth will be hard for your partner to hear, they will appreciate it in the long run.”
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Consider the Solo Stove Station a closet that keeps your fire pit tidy. The rack comes together in no time and has enough space to store a few fires worth of wood and your pit. It prevents your investment from withering away in the elements and keeps your patio looking tidy.
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Family values are important to discuss, as they are principles that govern and guide families. Here are eight to consider, as suggested by child development experts.
What’s Your Motto?
If family values help guide you, family mottos are repeatable slogans that condense the values into simple terms. Here are three mottos parents shared with us.
1. “There are two kinds of people in the world: The kind who get things done, and the kind who make excuses why they don’t get things done.”
“This used to annoy the hell out of me,” says Robert M. Wheeler, Jr. “Now I say it three times a week. Hell, I honestly don’t even have to say it anymore. If my daughter has slacked on something, as soon as I say ‘Emma…’ she’ll say ‘I know. There are two kinds of people…’”
2. “Be honest even…when it’s hard.”
“One person begins this sentence, and another finishes it,” says parent coach Kate Frasier. “We chose it because integrity in all things is important to me and my husband. Therefore, we wanted it to be important to our children.”
3. “It’s not a waste of time if you learned something.”
“This is something my parents would tell us when we were feeling frustrated, especially when we see no return to our efforts,” says Sander Tamm. “We heard the same thing when we had to do seemingly mundane tasks and chores at home. Looking back, there were countless ‘wasted moments’ but this motto reminded me that I’ve learned a lot from them.”
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Until the research becomes more diverse, non-white parents carry the unfair burden of reading developmental research with a massive caveat.
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