You probably think that you have values. Wait, scratch that — you know you have values. You have lots of them — good ones. You just keep them to yourself, but when you say them out loud …

Well, there’s the problem.

When determining your values, one of two things usually happens. You say them but they sound incredibly vague (Wow. I believe in honesty...) because you haven’t really defined them. Or, when you explain them, your rationale falls apart (I gave up playing all sports to spend time with my kids but is that the best way to promote being active?).

So maybe it’s time for a tune-up, or to establish a core set in the first place. In either case, it’s a good goal to take on. When you have firm values, life gets easier. Those stressful decisions, whether it’s moving for a job or letting someone merge, aren’t so stressful, because you’re not wondering if you did the right thing.

Consider this a call to create a list of your values. Doing so will help you, and it’ll help your kids. What can help you figure them out is to ask yourself a few questions and see where the answers lead.